Musem Of Motherhood ~ Share your stories here. Honoring mothers in perpetuity

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Paula Caplan on January 30, 2010 at 11:27 AM said:

In memory of Gertrude Gorbach Caplan, my father's mother

Paula Caplan on January 30, 2010 at 11:16 AM said:

In memory of Esther Shana Milner Karchmer, my mother's mother

Paula Caplan on January 30, 2010 at 11:08 AM said:

Honor of Esther Fujiwara, my daughter-in-law Personal Note: To my wonderful daughter-in-law, who is such a beautiful mother. Love, Paula

Paula Caplan on January 27, 2010 at 06:45 PM said:

In Honor of Emily Julia Caplan Stephenson Personal Note: For my dear, wonderful daughter, who is such a beautiful mother.

Skye White on January 22, 2010 at 02:12 PM said:

In regards to My Mother, Burnice; You’ve been my Rock You’re strong as stone You are a Queen upon a Throne You’re my Moma With you, I will always have a home never left alone even when the time comes your stories given to your children will carry on You lead the way taught me to pray Always knew that tomorrow would bring a better day When I come to a fork in the road It’s your amazing spirit that leads me down the right path I wouldn’t take one spanking back Cause, without it I wouldn’t be where I’m at Strong, Proud and not afraid to lead the crowd Your art is marvelous Your will is outstanding Your Love is everlasting As a single mother you were able to do it all pay bills, spins wheels, make deals, and look good while doing it all That’s my Moma, Burnice

Paula Caplan on January 17, 2010 at 05:03 PM said:

In Honor of my mother, Tac (Theda Ann) Karchmer Caplan - With gratitude for the wonderful mothering you have given to me.
Your loving daughter,
Paula (Donation sent)

Barbara Glickstein on January 14, 2010 at 10:38 AM said:

My mom, Ann Glickstein inspires me and encourages me. She loves life, connecting with people, the joy of music, has a great voice and can dance. She will love this museum & I plan on taking her to the opening celebration of the Museum of Motherhood. (Donation Sent)

Lisa Aymont Hunter on January 12, 2010 at 02:13 PM said:

Hi again. Please indulge me in allowing one more post. By the way, thank you for welcoming me to this site!

In case some of you are wondering, What's a woman with no children doing posting comments on a motherhood website? Well... when I was a young woman, I did choose to become a mother. Except my body did not cooperate. The whole fertility industry became a screaming nightmare for me. What I had deemed as a sacred intimate moment with the person I loved became a rigidly applied science experiment, night after night, ovulation after ovulation. My one pregnancy ended in a tubal; fortunately my body took care of it without the need for surgery. Now, at my age, I can say that being a woman without biological children is a choice I am at peace with. At the time of fighting with my body's infertility, it did not feel like it - it was a betrayal ... in a society that flung many messages at me around the expectation to have children (family, neighbours, coworkers, religion, the almight advertising industry). Even now, some people get that quirk to the eyebrow when I say No, I don't have children of my own. Some people were surprised to hear this because of the amount of patience I show for the children I work with. I say it's because I have no children at home that I have extra to splurge on the ones in the classroom! So what turned out to be a non-choice at first in my mind became a choice ... after all the fertility BS, I decided to walk away from the tests and drugs and operations, and the invasiveness of the adoption process, and define "family" as me, my partner, and our dog. It took me 15 years to see this as a choice I made instead of a situation imposed upon me by cruel fate. I share this for cathartic reasons as well as to comfort/empathize with other women out there who are struggling with infertility and indecision around the "choice" to have children. Is it possible to start out doing something for the "wrong" reason and end up living with the "right" reason? It's a personal choice to come to that conclusion. Thank you!

Lisa Aymont Hunter on January 12, 2010 at 01:25 PM said:

Tansi, Booshoo, Hello! I'd like to share my thoughts in response to the article in the Fall 2009 "Herizons" magazine (Winnipeg, Manitoba). First of all, please know that I am not a biological mother. I've asked myself if I'm then entitled to share my thoughts about mothering and motherhood, and I'm at a point in my life where I think I am! (I'm only 45, I should know better by now!) After reading the article and the comments on this website, I firmly believe in the power of choice around motherhood ... yet, isn't choice almost always influenced by external factors? I understand there are many factors to consider when deciding to bring a child into the world. My Aboriginal grandmothers utilized plant medicines to prevent conception during times of starvation or conflict; it was their choice to not have babies during a time that would pose threats to the children.

What I do wish for my sisters who are mothers is that they embrace the choice to be a mother on their terms. The pregnancy might have been unintended, but I still think there is a choice that is made to raise that child as a mother. Not that I'm saying it's always an easy choice. I have had friends go through guilt and shame around their pregnancy experiences due to the restrictive and often patriarchal attitudes abound amongst us.

That being said, I also appreciate there are many factors that skew and choke a conscious, assertive "choice": socio-political and socio-economic factors, the woman's health situation, and the culture's attitdues/biases toward mothering. And I'm probably missing other factors stemming from cultural pressures that restrict a woman's "choice" around motherhood. All I know is there are a lot of rigid expectations, demands, and rules (covert and overt) that come from those who don't have the "equipment" to have babies!

What I would like to see is a global society that honours motherhood as an individual's interpretation of birthing, raising and caring for a child while still giving to herself and her own life as a woman (as pointed out by Joy Rose in the article); a society that does not glamourize, romanticize, stigmatize, or sexualize motherhood but provides accessible, woman-centred, and empowering supports for a mother to raise her children in her own way, regardless of race, ability, sexuality, or financial situation.

Although no children have come through my body into this world, I still see myself in a nurturing role to the children I enjoy and love in my job in the school system. A traditional Medicine person told me it is said that women who do not have children of their own are already Grandmothers. I'm still figuring this out, but it was an honour to have this suggested to me, for I care very much about the children in this world and having a safe, healthy world for them to grow in! Ekosi! Lisa AH

Joy Rose on December 2, 2009 at 04:50 AM said:

Yesterday I shared a very special anniversary with my dear friend Pam Van Hoesen. (We've known each other since we were twelve). Nine years ago she gave me a kidney. I probably wouldn't be here without her generous gift. It saved my life after Lupus destroyed my body's renal function.

Part of her motivation to give to me had to do with her son, who was born with a heart defect. He received a heart from a anonymous donor over 20 years ago. He's doing great. In fact, he's an amazing miracle. Sick from birth. Heavily medicated. Stumbling along. Finally college and now all grown up, doing great and working and living independently in NYC.

He is a happy testament to love and the miracles of transplantation. (P.S. to the story is, he needed- and got a kidney from his Dad a few years ago, because the powerful anti-rejection meds. damaged his kidneys.)

Pam has been one of the most amazing, patient and giving friends and mothers I've ever known. She has raised four beautiful children (Three gorgeous daughters and Kreg), and kept me ticking - literally.

Everyone who meets her, says she's an 'angel' on earth. I know that's true.

Veronica on November 24, 2009 at 09:32 AM said:

This story was first shared at - http://mymothersstory.blogspot.com/2008_04_01_archive.html

Sunday, April 6, 2008 Veronica H - Pam's 3rd daughter, Arizona writer and mom to two girls My mother, Pamela Tiger, was part of the first senior class to graduate from Pequannock high school in New Jersey. In May 1960, the senior class initiated skip day, heading to their cars instead of the cafeteria at lunchtime. Those who had cars packed as many friends as they could into their vehicles and headed to the barn.

That afternoon in May, Pam was driving her boyfriend’s car. A hot car set up for drag racing. While sitting at a red light next to a fellow classmate, Pam heard the other guy rev his engine. She knew he wanted to show off. She decided to give him a run for his money.

When the light changed, Pam stepped on the gas, too. This was her first drag race, and it was up hill. Pam played it cool and shifted whenever the other driver shifted. And Pam Tiger won the drag race up Butler Hill on the inaugural senior skip day for Pequannock high school.

Maddie on September 21, 2009 at 10:33 AM said:

i was 15 when my mother died. all my life she had been an alcoholic, a user, and even a prostitute, but all that time she was messing up, i saw what a wonderful mom she could really be. i found that out 6 months before my 15th birthday, she had cirrhosis. then one night she got really sick and we took her to hte doctor and she had brain, lung, and liver cancer. for a short time i saw what having a real mother was like. Thankfully in the time my mother was sick she got saved and truly became the mom i always wanted. i am nearly 18 now, and it seems like she went home just yesturday. rest in peace Brenda Kay Murphy. 9/27/1955- 4/24/2007

Yalda on August 15, 2009 at 01:47 PM said:

“But I’ll be so old when I get my PhD.” I whined to my professor. “Either way you’re going to age: you choose -- get older with a PhD or without!” she replied. She had a point. Time wasn’t going to stop; I could spend the next six years keeping myself busy by focusing the bulk of my energy on my two children, or I could work towards a degree in a field that was fascinating to me. Granted, I was worried about being older than the other students, but I was more anxious about losing time with my children. Yet I also knew that as my kids grew up, I risked experiencing empty nest with a vengeance, lost without any sense of my own direction beyond being a mother. Many women of my generation experience this very same dilemma. Some of us stepped off a successful career track to stay at home with our children, and after the children started school, we began to grapple with the question of how to, or more importantly, whether or not we wanted to get back on. Women who had children before they established a career also face this dilemma. We all wonder what we are qualified for after spending five to ten years “just” being a mother. This quandary might seem like a luxury, especially when compared to the struggle of women who must work and raise children at the same time in order to make ends meet. I, and other women who face this issue, are extremely lucky that we have a choice. But sometimes too many choices can bring paralysis and indecision. None of the options seem viable: go back to a career of a 60+hours a week and rarely see your children, stay at home full time and never feel the reward of career satisfaction, or try to find something new that would allow you to spend time with your children and exercise your brain -- if you could only figure out what that was. We’re modern women who stopped our careers to tend to another part of ourselves, motherhood. We are supposed to be able have it all, so why are so many of us so frustrated? I never imagined that full time mothering would feel this way. When I became pregnant, I decided to stop working so that I could experience motherhood without interruption; truth be told, I couldn’t wait to leave my job. I had a fantasy that being a mother would be blissful and relaxing in contrast to my stress filled life as a movie executive. I soon realized that although motherhood was indeed blissful, it was also exhausting and at times emotionally draining. Moreover, even though I loved being with my children, I hated not working. But I was determined to stick it out until my second child was in pre-school. A bit bored, I took a class in psychology, with no goal other than exploring an interest. I quickly realized I loved the subject and investigated the process of going back to school, even though I was unsure if I would ever actually follow through with it. As I immersed myself in a university environment, I realized many things. First, my life experience was valuable and allowed me to contribute a perspective to the classroom that is often lacking. Indeed, in the field I am entering, developmental psychology, the fact that I have two children allows me to offer real life experience beyond the theoretical discussions. Second, I hope to work well beyond the traditional retirement age, and an academic career could afford me this option; experience is valued in this field, unlike in my old field where youth and short attention spans are considered major assets. Third, because I’m older and have already had a career, I know the pluses and minuses of the working world and have a deeper knowledge of who I am and what I am interested in. While many younger students go through a period of instability – struggling to define themselves, build families and succeed in their jobs; sometimes the career they spend their twenties building does not sustain them through their thirties and forties. I am arguably more committed to my career path. My friends have been fascinated with this journey and in some cases, inspired to explore careers that they may never have considered when they were younger. With a deeper self knowledge and significant multi-tasking capabilities honed from years of managing their families, older women offer unique expertise and experience. The adage that it’s never too late may actually be true. So yes, I will be old when I finish school, but it’s worth the extra time it’s taken to get here. Indeed, all of my prior experiences will help me succeed in this new path. I am ready, committed and excited to be a student again.

Museum Of Motherhood Exhibits In Seneca Falls, NY on July 8, 2009 at 01:53 AM said:

This summer, through August in Seneca Falls, New York USA, 'Moms Of Rock' graces windows and storefronts as we raise awareness about the museum and begin fundraising and a drive for a physical structure in earnest.

Jacqueline Dwyer on May 11, 2009 at 10:50 AM said:

I am a mother now always and forever. Before having children I was like a magnet to them, where ever I was they would be there wanting my motherly attention, love, voice and service. When I had children I knew that I did not want anyone's values instilled in them so I made the sensible decision to stay home and took care of my children according to the values I have and how I wanted them to grow and be in this fabulous world. Yesterday was Mothers' Day as they called it but I celebrate my day everyday because everyday is my day my understanding is that I must be celebrated everyday good or bad. I want to see governments of the world start looking at making and creating policies and laws giving women the right to pensions if they were stay at home mothers. We have may research indicating that mothers' who stay at home with their children give them the best possible start in life. Mothers' who work try really hard but have a harder time giving their children that wonderful first start. We have to be the change we honestly want to see in the world and starts with our children, who are rasing them when we are out working, what they are learning, what they are eating, how active they are, and how healthy they are psychologically and spiritually. Celebrate women because we are all mother.

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